Laughing at Myself

My doctor keeps telling me how young I look. My wife keeps telling me how old I look. At my age my doctor gets most of my income.
People have a fear of being kept alive when, medically speaking, there's no hope...so why do they call it a 'living' will?
I'm sixty-seven years old and I hope my sex life stays as good as it is for a few more years...once every other month fits my schedule just fine.
My wife told me I'm not as romantic as I used to be...I don't understand why, I hold her hand everytime she helps me get out of a chair.
In the spring, a young man's fancy turns to love...an old man's fancy turns on the air conditioner.
I spent my life moving in the fast lane...the only time I'm moving in the fast lane now is when I have to go to the pot.
When I was younger I spent a lot of time hanging out in my favorite bar. Now my favorite bar is the one I hang onto when I get up off the john.
In order to maintain my energy level, I take fifteen to twenty minute 'power' naps...about every fifteen to twenty minutes. It also makes for a shorter work day, usually two or three hours.
That's about it...time for a power nap so I can get back to some real work.